Antonia and James Christianson

You know, I often think the same thing about wedding planning as I do about raising a family. You listen to what people say, but don’t harp too much on it. Be polite, and truly listen what they have to say, but you have to choose what is best for your family, your spouse, your life, and let all other advice go by the wayside. I mean, I’ve done alright raising my 2 boys all these years, and cultivating my marriage, growing a successful business, etc. But, there is one piece of advice that I think is steadfast and true. The one statement that when I’m asked to share a tidbit of wisdom to those getting married that I always share, and it’s pretty simple. Choose your battles wisely. I remember my Mother in Law telling me this the day before I married my beloved, and this is the one thing I have chosen to live by. (Ok, there are a lot of things that I stand for, obviously, but this one little snippet of thought has kept me happy and out of huge fights for the last decade, so i’m going to stick to it). I often say, If it isn’t going to change history, or isn’t world altering, then it isn’t worth the battle.

I see couples all the time, that I feel like are fighting because one member always wants to be right. I never wanted to be that couple. I won’t say that James and I never fight. But I can tell you, that I probably could count on one hand the number of actual fights we have had. Sure, we disagree, or have a difference of opinion on parenting, business, home ownership, etc…but to actually fight. It’s usually not that serious. After all, if it’s not going to matter tomorrow, it’s probably not worth the battle today.

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